It’s Saturday night it’s 8:28 pm listening to NIN Ghost . I need to go running things have been crazy in every way the past few weeks as I was unloading groceries I began to cry . I thought of the last words my ex told me as he went to rehab . Mark my words Amy I’m tattooing your name on my ring finger we’re going to be together forever . I now sit here writing alone.I don’t know how anyone can lie so deeply when it comes to love some days I cant accept the pain of this . As I unloaded my groceries I rembered a woman ten years ago in the grocery store stopped me she said , “ Amy, be picky about the men you pick really picky because you are special . “
She knew my name she was a stranger. I thought about what she said but not enough to keep me away from the next ten years of a few bad guys and I wish she sat me down and mapped and out and said Amy love yourself.Don’t pick men who put you down,don’t pick men who don’t love God maybe I would’ve had some light bulb moment . But at 40 and broken have I finally gotten it as I lie here heart broken.After my ex found someone else? Now that I vow never to date again?Trust me I’m good with this decision . I’ll goadly stick to Gods side like glue and stay put for some healing and now I sit with my daughter and I tell her .....
Girl love yourself . And don’t let anyone abuse you or put you down and now I can send the healthy message. I’m very sad . Sad the one I loved left . Sad I didn’t leave someone who never valued me
Sad he never fillowed through on his promise or I wouldn’t be writing this at all.
It’s like a message in a bottle right . Hopefully someone will read it before it’s to late before they get broken and left .
We deserve only the best .
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