2019

It’s 11 pm. I just got home and I want to go running but it’s very cold outside.Ive become an introvert in my healing phase I’m ok with that. I’m definitely not an introvert. I’ve just come out of the hardest 2 years of my life. My focus is God, work , my kids and my job. In recreating a new me I’ve realized I crave authenticity. I hate bullshit talk that’s shallow and means nothing, I’d rather be at the gym with my head phones on or with my daughter. My list of friends are quite small but I can count on them and they are my family. Sadly my own brother and sister never call to see how I am. My brother never has once in the entirety of his life. I’m learning at 41 what love means.  I’m transparent we live once I hate politics it breeds fake people I either like someone or I don’t it’s pretty simple. I appreciate the kind people at my job sales is a harsh environment but it should be more dynamic.

I like my job, I love my boss he’s a cool person and outside of all this im lost. What’s next for me at 41. I’m single and alone. Will I ever find someone? I don’t date. Where will my future go.ive lived through great trauma. Now I want to make real memories.

I’m stronger then I ever have been. More focused more determined. What will 2020 be like.